Oh these pilots...

Oh these pilots...

Hello everyone,

I hope you missed me because I missed writing here and I know what I promised and my New Year’s pledge was not very helpful. The main reasons and not entirely bad excuses are some changes in my job right when I got back from my vacation I mentioned in my last post, therefore a lot of new work which I slowly get used to and fit in but also I moved and was busy with that during my vacation in summer. I was thinking several times on posting again but couldn’t find the time. So I’m terribly sorry for all of you waiting but I’m back finally. In the next time I might post a little bit more infrequently but this should get better over time.

 

For the start after the long break I wanted to comment on Nazita’s post on traveling by plane.

As an aerospace engineer I felt like she was talking of me when she described the situation where someone explained here the few-bolts-engine-hinge shocker

I don’t assume that he also told her that there is a bolt called “Jesus-Bolt” usually found on sail planes. It’s the bolt fixing the vertical with the horizontal stabilizer with the elevator on it at a T-tail configuration. But also found in older Helicopter models or in the connection from the two joining wings on a sail plane for quick removal to be put into a transport box.

Well this bolt is named after the person you will prey to, will see or whose name you will scream if it fails. So every pilot flying one vehicle containing a Jesus-Bolt will definitely check that through the little window or hole prepared for that check, before flight.

I hope I didn’t ruin your interest in flying

But let’s get to the thankful goodbye to the pilot after landing. In University we saw many things regarding capabilities of pilots. One really funny thing is the list of problems they reported to the ground crew (mechanics) after landing and the according answers of the ground crew on checking the issues. Here are a few of my favorites:

• Pilot: Mouse in cockpit
  Crew: Cat installed.
• Pilot: There is something lose in the cockpit.
  Crew: We tightened something in the cockpit.
• Pilot: Dead fly on the windscreen.
  Crew: Living flies ordered.
• Pilot: Engine 3 not present.
  Crew: Engine 3 found on the right wing after quick search.
• Pilot: Test flight OK. Landing was pretty hard with autopilot.
  Crew: Landing with autopilot not installed in this aircraft type.
• Pilot: Noise behind the instrument panel. Sounds like a dwarf hitting something with a hammer.
  Crew: We took the hammer from the dwarf.

Or some communication between the tower and pilots:

• Tower: Are you a A320 or A340?
  Pilot: A340 of course!
  Tower: Then would you please start also the two other engines for take-off!
• Pilot: Good morning Bratislava.
  Tower: Good morning. Just a hint: This is Vienna!
  Pilot: We are in approach for Bratislava now.
  Tower: This is really Vienna!
  Pilot: Vienna?
  Tower: Yes!
  Pilot: But why? We wanted to Bratislava.
  Tower: Okay. Then abort landing approach and fly left.
• Tower: Height and Position?
  Pilot: I’m 1.80m and sitting in the front left.
• Pilot: Requesting permission for take-off.
  Tower: Sorry, we don’t have your flight schedule. What’s your final destination?
  Pilot: Salzburg as every Monday.
  Tower: But today is Tuesday!
  Pilot: What? Then this is our day off.

Of course I have to add that these are some special cases and we all know everyone has a bad day every now and then. And I have some good friends who are pilots. So this was just something to cheer you up at a bad day or a bad flight

 

But one more thing I heard yesterday in the radio. This falls into the category “Research the world doesn’t need!”.

American Scientists found out that if you poison ants they always fall over to their right. But they didn’t find out why.

I wonder how much money was put in this research study and maybe we should ask if the people in Haiti can somehow use this knowledge to fight their plague? Not to mention that it must have been of highest importance to answer this long awaited answer that we had to sacrifice lots of ants for it.

Wish you all a nice day and till next time (hopefully soon )

Boris

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